Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Life in the "Beer League"... by D.Sloan

 Priceless, every "Beer League " player can relate to this, but it has Brian "Magic Man" Minish's life story written all over it !!

Former SVCU call up "Making an Eastern Swing....."

Evan "Man Boy" Morden

The SVCU Hockey Club's spirits were buoyed this week as they headed into their Wednesday night grudge match vs the Raiders.

The club was contacted by Everett Silvertips GM (and former Winnipeg Jets sieve) Doug Soetart earlier in the week to advise the Silvertips wanted to invite the club to next Wednesday's match up vs the Brandon Wheat Kings as their special guests.

After considerable deliberation, the SVCU oldtimers elected to pass on the offer as ticket sales to their Dec. 8 home date had already exceeded 2 (Marcel, Jeremy, and Matthew Munro) after hearing of his father (Mark Munro's) offensive outburst a week ago.

As displayed in the attached photo of SVCU alum Evan "Manboy" Morden, Soetaert was hoping SVCU patriarch Brian "Barnes" OldtimersMinish could teach the rest of the 'Tips dmen how to "walk the blueline" on the PP.

Morden suffered a slow start to the season (obviously missing the "what not to do" lessons regularly provided by SVCU dmen/lawyers Zamzow, Zamzow, & Campbell). However, he seems to be hitting his stride as Everett makes it's bi-annual trip to the Eastern outposts of the WHL.

Club spokesman Rob "Blogmeister" McDonald offered to host the Silvertips to a game on Thursday but Soetaert spoke to the fragility of the club's psyche and thought better of it.

If any of SVCU's legion of adoring fans would like to take in a 'Tips game call the SVCU transportation specialist Rick "Red Light Racicot" Reich for bus availability.

See you in the corners,

Dickie Dunn

Sunday, November 28, 2010

SVCU go 1-0-1 this week...Kopecky still searching...


SVCU opened the week with a 7-7 draw against the Swan Valley Outlaws. Playing in the cold comfy confines of the Minitonas Arena, the team welcomed back with open arms, puck stopper Mike "Smitty" Smith. The part time Greens Keeper/Big Game Hunting Guide returned from a weeks hiatus and did not disappoint. Lulling the Outlaws by  playing a "Dump and Chase" game to perfection, combined with Mike  "Smitty" Smith's timely puck stopping, allowed Craig "Zdneo" Zamzow the opportunity to go end to end in the dying seconds of the game to salvage the tie. Redemption was bittersweet for the veteran defense man, as it was rumored he needed to be rocked to sleep by his 10 year old daughter after his previous outing.
Rookie Wade "Booster" Cable continues to impress management. The hard working, fore checking forward seems to have settled into his role as the team's defensive specialist. He continues to score timely goals, and has often been overheard offering tips and encouraging words to struggling team mate Kevin "Special K" Kopecky. Pat "Crash " Morden's youngest offspring Riley " Mini-Man Boy" Morden  a late call up from the Swan Valley AA Midget Stampeders, played a solid game on the blue line. The big "Shit -Eating Grin" younger brother of current Everett Silvertips rookie blue liner Evan "Man Boy" Morden , played a "stay at home" game plan to perfection. The unselfish rookie AP stepped aside allowing veteran playing partner Craig "Zdeno" Zamzow to make countless end to end rushes all evening.

Craig "Zdeno" Zamzow

The second of back to back games had SVCU recording a 9-6 victory over SRFC on Wednesday evening.  Brian " The Thrill" Gilroy put on yet another offensive display recording four goals and two assists. Despite being slough footed and laying motionless on the ice for more than 15 minutes, Gilroy miraculously recovered, stayed on the ice for the teams ensuing 5-3 power play, and sniped his third of the evening. The Flamboyant forward was quoted as claiming his offensive output would double if he shed 30 lbs on a conditioning stint with Roblin North Stars of the North Central Hockey League.
The drought is over for feisty forward Mark "Scoreless No More" Munro who found the back of the net twice on a record breaking 35 plus shots on net evening. "I'm just happy to shed that f*cking gorilla off may back, I can only imagine what must be going through Kevin "Special K" Kopecky's mind!"  The snake-bitten Kopecky, who league statisticians are having a hard time retrieving the exact date of his last recorded goal, made several desperation end to end rushes, only to be stoned by SRFC net minder Ernie "The Glove" Pierrpont. The dejected sophomore quietly left the arena knowing that he is now the only active rostered player left to score for the famed SVCU.

Brian "The Thrill" Gilroy

Mark "Scoreless No More" Munro

Saturday, November 20, 2010

SVCU Suffer First Loss of Season...

Leading 8-4 after one, SVCU had a huge collapse in the second, ending up on the short end of a 10-9 O.T. loss. Despite an incredible offensive display by the recently re-united "M-G-M" line, (McDonald-Gray-Morden), including a late game laser by Jeremy "O.T. Kid" Gray to force overtime, the cocky young guns aka Kenville Flyers , sealed the deal in extra time.
SVCU free flowing, offensively charged back end was held off the score sheet for the first time this year. Kevin "Special K" Kopecky, the highly touted soft handed sophomore, continues to struggle offensively. Recording a record 25 shots on net, the disgruntled D-man is still searching for his first goal of the season. Playing partner Craig "Zdeno" Zamzow had what could only be characterized as a "Perplexing Performance". Countless give aways, poor decision making, and lack luster effort, have management scratching their heads. "Zamzow needs to bring that veteran presence and savvy  back into his game, and in a hurry,  in order to justify his ice time minutes!"

Craig "Zdeno" Zamzow

On loan from the Swan River Raiders, former SVCU player turned puck stopper Warren " Stack em" Clark filled in admirably. Coming off a huge win the previous night (4-3 Raider win over Valley Outlaws), it was apparent the "deep in the crease" Clark was tired and off his game.

Jeremy "O.T. Kid" Gray

Jeremy "OT Kid" Gray's 5 goal performance has put the gifted goal scorer back into the league scoring race. Not to be overlooked, offensively challenged diminutive forward Rob "Blogmeister" McDonald once again surprised opponents and teammates alike , with a 5 point night! (2goals 3 assists)
Scoring woes continue for healthy scratch Mark "Squeeze" Munro and Kevin "Special K" Kopecky , the two remaining active roster players to record their first goals of the season. Rumor has it that Brian "The Thrill" Gilroy has started a pool, squares are available from any active or former SVCU player!

R.I.P. Mr. Pat Burns.....

Sunday, November 14, 2010

SVCU win big, Matieka scores 6....

Randy "Meat Head" Matieka
SVCU recorded their sixth straight victory of the season with a striking 19-6 win over the Minitonas Loggers. Randy "MeatHead" Matieka continued his scoring prowess with an impressive 6 goal performance. Skating in the  rink where it all began, Minitonas prodigal son did not disappoint.
Coming off what could be deemed his most disconcerting game in decades, Brian "The Thrill" Gilroy regained his magic and posted his third multiple goal game of the season .Playing with an undisclosed injury at the hands of a vicious two hander, it is reported that the crafty center men survived 48 hours in the hospital , under the watchful eye of an Egyptian physician, and still managed to make the road trip to Minitonas. Also coming up big on the score sheet were Warren "Wheels" Gray , Blaine "Soup" Campbell and Brian "Magic Man " Minish with three each. Craig "Zdeno" Zamzow also tallied for a single.

Horrendous undisclosed upper body injury!

Sophomore Derek "DH" Holtom notched his first of the season, virtually keeping his name off the bottom of the depth chart. The scoring drought continues for rookie Mark " Manhandler" Munro, as it appears he has a horrible case of " Grip the stick to tightis!" Failing to produce up front,  Knight, Munro, and Holtom were relegated to the back end for the second period, where DH almost sustained a career ending back injury , tripping over his own blue line.

Mark "Squeeze" Munro!

Saturday, November 13, 2010

6 - 3 . SVCU Tarnish the Silver Seven...

Matieka in his office !

The SVCU extended their winning to Five, lead by a three goal performance by Randy "make mine a Hattie" Matieka. Skating for the first time this season, the grizzled veteran scored on his first two shots on net, and was all but assured of turning the trick. Finding  himself snake bitten until the late stages of the game despite having more shots on goal than the entire "Silver Seven " roster, Matieka finally found the back of the net with an over powering wrist shot that caught the Silver Seven net minder short side.
Former SVCU winger, turned goaltender extraordinaire, Warren "Close the door" Clark, on loan from his parent club the Swan River Raiders, single handedly ended Brian "The Thrill" Gilroy's scoring streak. The frustrated forward was thwarted all night. Shot after shot, break away after break away, the gifted Gilroy was denied by his former teammate. A somewhat subdued and disappointed Gilroy, quietly left the dressing room before he could be reached for comment.

Brian "The Thrill " Gilroy
Craig "Zdneo" Zamzow, stepping up front, added a single, and some much needed physical presence, even if he was having trouble discerning between burgundy and white. Woes continue for rookie Mark "Man handler" Munro, registering a record 10 shots on goal,  finished the game with a 0.00 scoring percentage.
Jeremy "OT Kid" Gray,the tireless back checker, rounded out the scoring for SVCU.

Saturday, November 6, 2010

S.V.C.U. Pillage Raiders 7-4...

Chris "Lanks" Zamzow.
Pat "Crusher" Morden made the very best of his season debut. Showing that there is more to his game than the "Punishing  Power Forward" moniker, Morden bulged the twine twice, and was an offensive threat all evening. Falling just short of his first "Hat Trick" in numerous seasons, it is apparent that Morden's commitment to off-season running and dry-land training should provide huge dividends this season. Leading by example, the veteran forward wanted to start the season on the right foot, despite his oldest boy's  escapades with the Everett Silvertips.
Also making his season debut, Chris "Lanks" Zamzow provided some huge minutes on the back end. Resorting back to the 3 man system, "Lanks" 6 plus minute shifts, although falling just short of sophomore standout "Dancing" Danton Ashcroft's 8 minute shifts, provided some much needed rest for veteran rearguard Craig "Zdeno" Zamzow. This proved beneficial, as the elder Zamzow continued to keep his scoring streak alive. Adding the perfect mix to the "Zamzow "defensive cocktail, one time feisty forward Kevin "Special K" Kopecky provided stability and poise on the blue line, allowing the run and gun game of the brothers Zamzow to shine.
Silky smooth center men  Brian "The Thrill" Gilroy, playing in his third consecutive game of the season, continues to impress . Scoring one , setting up three, it looks like he may  be making a run for the league scoring title this year.
There appears to be some movement on the SVCU player depth chart. With both Brian "Magic Man" Minish and Rob "Blogmeister" McDonald continuing their somewhat surprising scoring streaks, and rookie Wade "Booster" Cable scoring his first, the battle for bottom dominance looks to be shared by Derek "D.H." Holtom and Mark " Man Handler" Munro. When asked about this current situation, Director of Player Personnel and former SVCU PIM leader Dave "Did I cut Ya" Bettesworth had some words of warning.  " Our current roster situation is always under very close scrutiny, under no circumstances should a player consider himself untouchable or irreplaceable ! "
Concerned Director of Player Personnel Dave "Dr.Death" Bettesworth.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

S.V.C.U. 6-1 win over Swan River Action...

Brian "The Thrill " Gilroy
After finishing last week with a 12-5 felling of the Logger's from Minitonas, SVCU opened the week with a convincing 6-1 win over Swan River Action. Brian "The Thrill" Gilroy, playing in his second straight game , lead all scorers with 3, and not to be outdone, Blaine "Soup" Campbell added a Hattie of his own. Despite having  trouble clearing the puck out of his own end, Campbell made amends with perennial all star puck stopper Mike "Smitty " Smith , by picking it up in the late stages of the game. Jeremy "OT Kid" Gray , continued his scoring prowess  notching 2, while singles went to Warren "Wheels" Gray , Rob "Blogmeister " McDonald, Derek "Hands" Holtom, and fleet footed veteran Brian "Magic Man" Minish.

The once reliable "Back End" again struggled early against a hard pressing Action squad. Craig "Zdeno" Zamzow , known for his timely tape to tape crisp passes, seemed to be experiencing a bad case of color blindness! After leaving Smitty hanging out to dry for what seemed like the 8th time in a row, the over zealous reargaurd finally found his stride in the second period. Taking a page out of the "Sorry seems to be the hardest word" book penned by Blaine "Soup" Campbell, Zamzow responded by posting his first multiple goal game of the year. Blowing the game wide open in the second, Jeremy "OT Kid " Gray notched the natural Hat trick. Scoring on the "Most exciting play in hockey", Rob "Blogmeister" McDonald on the penalty shot, deftly deked stunned Action goaltender Jeremy "Giant" Hohn, to round out the scoring.

"Say it ain't so", were the words heard around the Valley today as it was announced that cagey veteran Dennis "The Surgeon" Bowles has decided to call it a career. Rest assured the" Master of the Stick", will be missed by those who had the privilege of skating beside him.

Happier Times.. circa 2007